Monday, February 4, 2008

Arabilious

That means morose, dejected. All of a sudden I realize that I cannot remember the last time I have laughed. I realized that I have not found a field that I am enthusiastic about yet. It suddenly felt like I was just going with the motions. I have no idea where my mind is most of the time. I have a horrible time concentrating. It's like I'm not really there. I guess this morning I felt like I was alive where sitting in church, but then it feels like that I was totally lost again. I really thrive on drama, don't I? I feel indifferent and extremely sensitive all at the same time. It always feel like I was an outsider looking in. Like nothing makes sense.